The dealio is special bred pubic crab louses from Japan (not the same as homeless people's variety of lice exactly).
They're unfucking believable!
First, they DON'T BITE, they just live off dead skin cells and such in your bush. Really, you're cleaner with them there than without them.
Second, these babies are HUGE!!! Well, huge compared to regular lice. And they just live happily in your underwear.
It's so COOL! They grow, and have families.
You can feel em living and crawling around. It's like having personal Sea monkeys in your pants ;-)
Seriously, though, they really are my personal pets that go everywhere with me. You get attached to them like any pet.